What Jones Holiday Soda Are You?

  1. If you were going to dye your hair a funky color, what would it be?
    • Red
    • Uh... brown?
    • Pink
    • Green
    • Purple
    • White
    • Yellow in the front, blue in the back
  2. Be brave. You've got to sample one of your Aunt Bettie's crazy Thanksgiving concoctions. What do you choose?
    • Her Seaweed-Tofu-Gizzard rollups
    • Her Gummy Bear Cake ... held together with Marshmallow Cream and Cheerios
    • Her Sour Cranberry Soup topped with Candy Corn
    • Her Trailer Trash Trash Hot Dog and Ketchup Loaf
    • Her Mashed Potato Mountain with a Butter Volcano and Okra Natives
    • Her Green Bean - Lime Jello - Lucky Charms fiesta salad
    • Her Whipped Cream Pie With Pumpkin Topping
  3. If you had a pet turkey, you'd name him...
    • Zippy
    • Elvis
    • Dinner
    • Brother
    • Chicken
    • Ticket to the Moon
    • The Gobbler
  4. What holiday tradition do you most look forward to?
    • Full contact football
    • Making mom cry
    • Stuffing green beans up your nose
    • Starting a mutiny at the kids table
    • Stuffing your gut
    • The fruitcake toss
    • Extra strong eggnog with the family drunks
  5. Pick your poison:
    • Koolaid
    • Whiskey
    • Beer
    • Milk
    • Cheap wine
    • Vodka and anything
    • Diet soda

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